at least thats what i call them.
let me explain.
first, know that im attributing this greatly to the fact that ive been sitting here since 8:30pm (its now 12:24am) or so dealing with a randomly intense-ish anxiety attack and i have *NO* idea why.... so im attributing the following rant to that...
"Today's rant is brought to you by Anxiety: 'Cause everything seems worse with an anxiety attack! *bing!* ::flashes a grin and swings arm in for a thumbs up:: (thats my commercial spot for the day...)
ANYWAY...... hoe band....
when i first met keith he was a member of a pop punkish kinda band, so im used to screaming little 14 -16 year olds screaming about how hot he is while they're standing right next to me with NO CLUE that im his girlfriend (or was... at the time). its cute actually. ...it probably also helped that it was a CHRISTIAN band... so... you know... the chances of hoes coming out of the woodwork were slim to none.... (not that there weren't any.............. thats another story thats not mine to tell because it has to do with another band member...). After them he played with a bunch of alternative country rock type bands... sweet stuff. love it. sure the band's have groupies here and there, but they attract a kind of older crowd... not OLD like grandma old... just... upper twenties through early 40's type deal. again. groupies happen, but not a big deal.
then he played with the blues brotherhood band (while playing with the alt country bands and/or blues bands...) even older crowd still.
the other day he was at the jam at the Sands in Bethlehem and he got scouted by the president of [enter management company here] (i started to write it out, but i thought better about posting it on the WWW. ...nothign is solid so i guess i shouldn't go spreading this shit around unless it falls through... just in case some of the hoe groupies of the band happen to be lurking on weddingbook and are planning on running to the band screaming "OH MY GOD, IS IT TRUE?! 
ANYWAY............ its this entertainment company that has a bazillion cover bands on their roster... and im talking about high paying gig cover bands that play night clubs and what i like to call "party bars" and this and that and whatever.
well the dude gave keith his card and said he had 2 bands looking for a drummer.
keith's got an audition coming up this week sometime... er, next week actually... (and knowing my lovely husband........to be........ he'll be auditioning THEM as much as they're auditioning him lmao! ...the boy does *not* like to waste his time with worthless projects. if its a dead end gig, they better pay well... if they pay sh*tty, they better not be a dead end gig.... lmao). so anyway (i say that a lot...) i just got done checking out this band...
and i think i had a heart attack.
party band is an accurate term i suppose. HOE band is my affectionate name for bands like these................. they play at places like the ever infamous (to my group of friends anyway, cause we always seem to get into fights there for some reason, even though it NEVER happens ANYWHERE else. ever.) hardware bar. for those of you who don't know what the hardware bar is (and im assuming 98% of you dont...) its like your real life coyote ugly in harrisburg, pa. theres a bar wide enough to dance on and the bartenders will and do. ...and any female patron can just take her little ass on up there and dance till her heart is content. (its all fun and games until some stupid b*tch puts her wine down RIGHT IN FRONT of where you're dancing with POINTED shoes on, which when worn, don't allow you to feel ANYTHING with your toes.... and then you kick it over... get her mostly white dress drenched in red wine.... the spanish chick wants to fight you..... and you're trying to make eye contact with your unobservant fiance who SHOULD be watching you up on the bar in the FIRST place but is staring off into space looking at god knows what.... to get you down of the bar before Mercedes climbs up and beat the ever living SH*T out of you...................... no, im not making that up. i have a funny (to me) yet derrogetory (not to me, cause i own the term... im puerto rican...) name for that almost-fight.)
where was i... i lost my train of thought..... (im sure you did too)... oh yeah. hardware bar... coyote ugly... anyway. that place is SUPER packed all the time. this is the kind of band that plays at THAT kind of bar. you can't move an inch wihtout having drunk dudes hitting on you even with your ring on and your fiance one stool down from you, while you're flagging down the bartender... "im engaged."
"the ring comes off"
"he's RIGHT THERE."
"i bet im better in bed than him..."
"f*** off."
those bars are a MAGNET for hoes and manwhores alike........... and i was watching this promo video for the band and surprise surprise, i recognize the hardware bar........... and one of the last songs of this promo video is "girls girls girls" (that might not be the right title) by .... i dunno who...... and there are TONS of girls (okay... like... 7... or 10....) on the stage... dancing around in their skimpy little................
dear god, my husband......... to be........ might be playing HOE shows every week. MULTIPLE hoe shows. and i won't even be able to GO to most of them.
the groupies he had before... i could deal with.... they weren't REAL groupies.........
THESE are real groupies. *REAL*. *GROUPIES*.
i trust him. i really really do........ but it kinda makes me uncomfortable to think about him constantly flogged by a bunch of hot skinny bitches that just wanna jump on his d***.
heaven for him, im sure... mr. "i never get hit on by girls..."
a nightmare for me. cause half those bitches don't even CARE if you're THERE with him. dear god, i was in a situation before i was 21 when he played a show with some of our friends, just for fun... a one time thing... and some girls were hitting on him while he was having a drink upstairs and he even pointed me out over the railing (there was a balcony overlooking the downstairs stage and dance floor) and told her he was with me and she STILL hit on him. hoe.
im not saying *EVERYONE* that goes to those places is a hoe... so don't get all huffy... i mean... *I* go sometimes (clearly), and *IM* not a hoe... but you can't deny that 80% of the clientele.... kinda is.
like i said... i trust my FH 100%, without a doubt........... but it still makes me nervous.
sorry for the rant.
